One of the joys of being affectionate with my wife...apart from the immediate rewards...is that it builds a foundation for the occasional fighting that needs to take place. Without that foundation, any disagreement would be a threat to our relationship. But we know that our love is stronger than some temporary turmoil and so we are freed up to really mix it up.

This is the way it should be with God.

Freed up to mix it up.

But we must have a foundation. Prayer, worship, Eucharist...these are the things that make for a strong foundation. These are the instruments of affection that allow us to do a little fighting on occasion.

Too often, someone’s first real encounter with God is a fight without a foundation. A loved one dies, a tragic divorce, a rebellious child...these are the things that bring out the pain and anger but without the foundation of love there is little comfort or release.

One of the few negatives of my job is being cornered at a social gathering and being lectured by someone as to how angry they are with God. They blame God for all the bad and never give God credit for any of the good.

No wonder they are mad!

If that was the way my wife and I treated each other, we certainly wouldn’t be living together.

We all need a healthy balance of affection to temper the anger.